First published on Jul 22, 2026
Quick housekeeping before we dive in. I've started a Substack dedicated to fatherhood writing. This piece is cross-posted there. If that's your kind of thing, check it out.
Six months is an interesting moment. It is the penultimate milestone that feels truly meaningful to talk about: after a year, they are toddlers, small children that develops and grows in a completely different way. More than half of their lives so far have passed since my last post; sometimes it has felt like a Sisyphean struggle where the calendar never moves forward, and yet today it feels like my last post was just yesterday.
In the chaos of these early days, watching the twins develop at a terrifyingly fast pace, I almost missed how Elijah, my eldest, has changed. His birthday is fast approaching and soon having three under three will be a title we can no longer proudly claim. His language has expanded, matured and deepened; his curiosity about the world around him grows daily and his independence is enough now for me to desperately wish for him to slow down.
Before I get too soppy, a few more observations now half a year has passed.
Still, still a celebrity Not much to it, now. Wherever you go, you will be pseudo-famous: people of all ages will come up and talk to you, ask questions of varying degrees of sanity and go completely out of their way to try and help out whether you need it or not. I thought it might get old but it remains very endearing. On a similar note, you do also occasionally hear the odd whisper as somebody notices: "Jesus Christ, twins", or my favourite, "oh, the poor bastards". I assume in reference to us as parents though maybe they were sympathising with the twins...
People don't understand twins When you learn about any topic deeply, you often forget that the average person doesn't know much about it. I'm constantly amazed at how many people aren't aware that not all twins are identical. I'm equally amused when, after learning they are entirely different sexes, they ask 'so are they identical?'. Reflecting back, I probably had no idea either; but now I take great pleasure in discussing the nuances of fraternal vs. identical twins and the fascinating biological oddities that are required in both cases.
Predictability I suppose this is true for singletons too, though I can't remember anything from the first six months the first time round, but a semblance of order is beginning to overtake the chaos. Naps are, by and large, on a consistent schedule. Nighttime sleep, whilst far from perfect, is at least consistently imperfect, and their feeding is like clockwork. This is probably 50% nature as their brains develop and 50% the superhuman effort my wife makes day in, day out to keep everybody happy and healthy.
My age feels like a factor now Is this really a note on twins? I'm not sure. There are two of them, after all. I'm 35 now. I was 32 when Elijah was born and both physically and mentally I notice a significant difference. I ache more, lack of sleep makes me far more foggy and I generally don't feel as sharp. Part of this is a recently regressed diet and non-existent exercise routine but I've anecdotally heard many people say 35 is when age becomes far more obviously a factor. The warning light has come on: a huge reminder and kick in the backside to take health seriously. I want to be fully active and able for the entirety of their lives as children and for years to come.
Emerging distinct personalities Evelyn smiles at every person she sees and every thing she interacts with. She also reacts with blood-curdling screams when something upsets her. There is very little middle ground. Arthur has a more stable baseline: you have to earn your smiles and he will tolerate more before becoming upset. Their unique traits and ways of interacting with the world become clearer every day which is both wonderful and a little terrifying: it brings home that right now their personalities are being formed and moulded by everything they encounter.
They've discovered each other Around the four-month mark they seemingly became aware that they were next to one another. Now they look at each other and smile, reach out and hold hands and occasionally lie on their sides looking at each other babbling away in their own secret language. It is reassuring to know that they have been blessed with a best friend for life from day one.
We've stopped saying "the twins" Maybe not entirely, but they have evolved from "the twins" to Arthur and Evelyn. Their distinct personalities, as mentioned above, mean that their unique 'twinness' is no longer the defining trait. They are very clearly their own little people and need to be engaged with in their own unique way.
The first six months were about surviving twins. The next six, I suspect, will be about getting to know Arthur and Evelyn.
That's it for now; I am planning a final "Notes on Twins" post at the one year mark, though hopefully plenty more writing between now and then.